All About That Bass Parody

Because this song's all about being big, suck a dick, thin people

If you are super thin super thin you're evil

This catchy tune's message should have been we're equal

But it shames thin women, thin women (me, me, me, men)

Yeah it's kind of clear, I like to eat food

But I can write big hit songs and I can sing em too

I see these skinny girls that get super famous

So I say, hey why not Meghan Trainor?

I talk like I am black even though I am white

I lived in the suburbs I've had a perfect life

Still there's one thing bugs me, I don't know why

But when I see good-looking skinny people I think they should die

Yeah, my mama she told me don't worry about your size

But when I see thin women I want to gouge out their eyes

Gouge out their eyeballs

Gouge out their eyeballs

When I hear Gwyneth Paltrow say oh my god, I feel so fat

I want to beat in her pretty face with a baseball bat

Woah!

Now all five of us will do this dumb dance this dumb dance

We're dancing

These girls need haircuts bad really bad

We can't see

Meghan give me a chance just one chance to rest please

I hired you to dance damnit dance!

I'm bringing booty back

Booty never left that statement is trash!

Wow, I'm just playing, don't hate me cause I'm fat!

You're actually normal

Every inch of you is perfect, stop acting like a victim!

Yeah, my mama she told me that being big is sexy

And that it turns on men which totally validates me

Makes me feel pretty, makes me feel pretty

I thought this song was supposed to be bout loving you for you

It is

Then why are you basing you self worth off of pleasing dudes?

Now let me reiterate it again if you're thin, you're a bitch

That's totally not true and completely mindless

I'm actually on my way to help the homeless

Nice try but that can't be you're skinny

Meghan your single "All About That Bass" is a hit!

It's platinum!

It's time to lose some weight for your next pop anthem

But I'm about that bass and that means I'm curvy

That's why everyone like bout this song

Now Meghan do you wanna be a star or a one-hit wonder?

If you don't lose some weight that would be a blunder

To help you get in shape we've brought in a trainer

It's time to get you ripped! Let's do this!

--VIDEO--

Burn The Bass!

Hi, I'm Tony Horton creator of P90X and I got a brand new program for slightly over weight pop stars to go from Bass to Treble in just 90 seconds.

It's called TREBLE90X.

Burhn the bass! -- Burn it!

I'm burning it!

Louder now!

Burn the Bass!

Yeah, your mama might of told you don't worry about your size but in this cut throat industry, eh, your mamma don't know shit.

Baby -- nice!

Oh that's sexy stuff right there.

I used to be all about that bass, bout that bass, no treble.

But now thanks to TREBLE90X I am so all about that Treble.

I was just hating on skinny bitches because I was jealous.

Now I am one.

It worked for Meghan and I know it will work for you too.

So get off your pop star ass and call now.

To order your copy of TREBLE90X call 1-555-POOP-FAT.

That's 1-555 P.O.O.P. F.A.T.

Make sure to consult your closest physician if you experience any signs of uncontrollable pooping, sneezing, wheezing, rashing, heaving, dancing, prancing whining, or singing crappy self righteous pop songs about random shit you think about while sitting at home on a Saturday night.

I know you wanna burn the bass -- come on now!

• Artist:Bart Baker