Underground lyrics

[Intro]

A lot of people ask me

Where the fuck I've been at the last few years

Shit, I don't know

But I do know I'm back now

Haha

[Chorus]

Here comes the rain and thunder now

Nowhere to run, to run to now

I disappeared, don't wonder how

Lookin' for me? I'm underground

Here comes the rain and thunder now

Nowhere to run, to run to now

I disappeared, don't wonder how

Lookin' for me? I'm underground

[Verse 1]

Dre, I'm down here, under the ground, dig me up!

Broken tibias, fibias, yeah, fix me up

Sixty sluts, all of them dyin' from asphyxia

After they sip piss through a Christopher Reeves sippy cup

Dixie cups, toxins, boxes of Oxy pads

Enough Oxycontin to send a fuckin' ox to rehab

Wack job in the back in a black stocking cap

Jackin' off to a hockey mask at a boxing match

(He can't say that!) Yes, he can

I just did, faggot, now guess again

Better text message your next-of-kin

Tell 'em shit's about to get extra messy

Especially when I flex again

And throw a fuckin' lesbian in wet cement

Faggoty, faggoty, faggoty! Raggedy Ann and Andy

No! Raggedy Andy and Andy

No, it can't be, it can't be—yes, it can be

The fuckin' Anti-Christ is back, Dante

It's Satan in black satin panties

This is Amityville, calamity, goddamn it

Insanity, pills, fanny pack filled with Xannies

Through every nook and cranny, lookin' for trannies

Milk and cookies spilled on my silk négligée, looky

Razor-ba-lades with me to make you ba-leed

Cases of Maybelline makeup lay on a table of weed

Slim Shady? Shit sounds like a fable to me

'Til he jumps out of the fuckin' toilet when you're takin' a pee

[Chorus]

Here comes the rain and thunder now

Nowhere to run, to run to now

I disappeared, don't wonder how

Lookin' for me? I'm underground

Here comes the rain and thunder now

Nowhere to run, to run to now

I disappeared, don't wonder how

Lookin' for me? I'm underground

[Verse 2]

Six semen samples, seventeen strands of hair

Found in the back of a van after the shoot with Vanity Fair

Hannah Montana, prepare to elope with a can opener

And be cut open like cantaloupe on canopy beds

And Glad bags, yeah glad to be back

'Cause last year was a tragedy that landed me smack-dab in rehab

Fuckin' doctor, I ain't understand a damn word he said

I planned to relapse the second I walked out of that bitch

Two weeks in Brighton, I ain't enlightened

Bitin' into a fuckin' Vicodin like I'm a Viking

Oh, lightning is strikin', it might be a fuckin' sign I need a psychic

Evaluation, fuck Jason, it's Friday the 19th

That means it's just a regular day (hah!)

And this is the kind of shit I think of regularly

Fuckin' lesbian shouldn't have had her legs in the way

Now she's pregnant and gay, missin' both legs and beggin' to stay

[Chorus]

Here comes the rain and thunder now

Nowhere to run, to run to now

I disappeared, don't wonder how

Lookin' for me? I'm underground

Here comes the rain and thunder now

Nowhere to run, to run to now

I disappeared, don't wonder how

Lookin' for me? I'm underground

[Verse 3]

Tell the critics I'm back and I'm comin' to spit it back in abundance

Hit a fag with onions, then split a bag of Funyuns

Mad at me? Understandable, cannibal, shoot an animal

Out of a cannon and have 'em catapult at an adult

Captain of a cult with an elite following

To turn Halloween back into a trick-or-treat holiday

Have Michael Myers lookin' like a liar, swipe his powers

Replace his knife with flowers and a stack of fliers

Hit Jason Vorhees with a 40; stuck a suppository

Up his ass, and made him tell me a story

Gave Hannibal Lector a fuckin' nectarine

And sat him in the fuckin' fruit and vegetable section

And gave him a lecture

Walked up Elm Street with a fuckin' Wiffle bat drew

Fought Freddy Krueger and Edward Scissorhands too

And came out with a little scratch, ooh

Lookin' like I got in a fuckin' pillow fight with a Triple F.A.T. goose

Insanity, can it be vanity?

Where's the humanity in having a twisted fantasy

With an arm-and-leg amputee?

Straitjacket with a hundred and eight brackets

And a strap that wraps twice around my back

Then they latch it; cut your fuckin' head off

And ask where you're headed off to

Get it? "Headed off to?" Medic, this headache's awful!

This anesthetic's pathetic, so is this diabetic waffle

And this prosthetic arm keeps crushin' my hard taco

[Chorus]

Here comes the rain and thunder now

Nowhere to run, to run to now

I disappeared, don't wonder how

Lookin' for me? I'm underground

Here comes the rain and thunder now

Nowhere to run, to run to now

I disappeared, don't wonder how

Lookin' for me? I'm underground

[Outro]

So, it wasn't a choice, it was "I had to do this."

And now I got 90 days clean

And uh, that's all I have to share, thanks

(Thanks for sharing, Brian

Is there anyone else who'd like to share this evening?)

Yeah, I got something to share:

"When you walked through the door you were queer to me

So come here, baby boy, just come here to me

You're a cock-boy, everybody wants you

You're gayer than you would ever claim to

I won't have to rape you

So, homie, lay down, down, down

Lay down, down, down

Lay down, down, down, lay down, lay down."

Where's everybody going?

This always went over real big in Gay-A

Okay, wait, I got another one

"I just love condoms and lots of cum."

No? Well, shit!

• Artist:Eminem
• Album:Relapse (2009)