Living With a Hernia lyrics

Help me out! Dig!

All I do is grunt and groan

Hurts me to walk anywhere

Went to see my physician, Dr. Jones

He took my trousers off, told me to cough

Doctor says there ain't nothin' to discuss

He tells me any day I might have to wear a truss

Living with a hernia

All the time, such aggravation

Living with a hernia

Gonna be my ruination

Living with a hernia

Got to have an operation

Feel so old

Too much back pain

Good gawd, drives me insane

Can't run, barely crawl

Got a bulge in my intestinal wall

Walk real funny, bless my soul

Can't play tennis and it's hard to bowl

You can't even do the splits now - say it!

Better call it quits now

Now I'm sick of all this dancin' anyhow

Living with a hernia

Hurts me bad in a tender location

Living with a hernia

Had enough humiliation

Living with a hernia

Got to have an operation

I live with a hernia

Can't get up, can't bend over

Now I live with a hernia

Wait a minute ...

You may not be familiar with the common types

Of hernias that you could get

So just settle down, let me clue you in:

There's incomplete (incomplete)

Epigastric (epigastric)

Bladder (bladder)

Strangulated (strangulated)

Lumbar hernia (lumbar hernia)

Richter's hernia (Richter's hernia)

Obstructed (obstructed)

Inguinal and direct

Living with a hernia - rupture!

I said it's causin' me such irritation

Living with a hernia

Have to have my medication

Living with a hernia

I feel bad!

• Artist:Weird Al Yankovic